Friday, November 8, 2013

Round Table Discussion: Feminism & Spanking




This is how I feel about my spanking needs & my freedom to express them. Having this outlet makes me feel like I have super powers. I can accomplish anything. Spanking gives me the outlet I need & focuses me in a way that I am a much more productive human being. I am grateful beyond measure that I have this option in my life. After all, even Wonder Woman needs a good spanking every now and again.

I feel like all things healthy, empowering, & good boil down to one thing…choice. Feminism has gone a long way to provide that choice to women. It was not long ago that women were owned first by their fathers and then later by their husbands. They had no choice except what was permitted by those in charge of them. They had no real voice at home or in public. There were no repercussions if either of these men hurt or abused them on any level.  While it’s true that families remained intact far more often than they do today, & it was socially acceptable for wives to obey their husbands, these two things do not equal happiness While it would be nice to have my chosen lifestyle weather in the bedroom or as a whole relationship style with my husband to be accepted and not ostracized by mainstream society I also value my choice in the matter heart and soul. I value my freedom and ability to choose what kind of life I live to the molecules of my being. Feminism has done wonders for this world.



At the root of the matter, though, I am a humanist. I value human rights above all else. I think my DD sisters who feel nostalgic for a time when tearing down your husband wasn’t socially acceptable have a point. A woman having equal rights & value does not mean that treating men with disdain should be acceptable too. Love & respect in marriage & society would be ideal. It is also what I strive for in my own life. My husband is not stupid & neither am I. Neither of us deserves to be treated as if we are.  I don’t think going back in time will solve this dilemma. It trades one set of mistreatment for another. In history there are many examples of the pendulum swinging. This is just one example of that. Many times when a group of people have been oppressed for a time once that oppression is lifted it is natural for the pendulum to swing in the other direction.  We over compensate for past slights. Eventually that pendulum will rest right in the middle. I am hoping we will find that happy medium in this realm soon.

I am so grateful that my sisters & brothers before me fought for my human rights & my rights to choose. Because of that fight I get to choose to explore a spanking fetish & lifestyle. My husband and I were able to choose to explore spanking in the bedroom & later choose to incorporate a DD lifestyle by agreement in our marriage. Surrendering in this set of circumstances makes me happy. Having my rear end reddened both in the bedroom and as discipline helps make my world go round. Just as choosing to be a stay at home mom, writer, & holistic health care practitioner have added great quality to my life. Without feminism I would have none of this.

Before I end this I also have to address the thought that is floating out there that choosing to be spanked or to submit to someone else is in some way dis-empowering to females & a setback to feminism. As a choice that is incredibly empowering to me who is to judge what empowers whom? Just as it was unfair many years ago to be controlled by one set of very limiting beliefs on what is wrong and what is right it is just as wrong today no matter which side you are on. Being taken across a man’s knee to be spanked is an intimate act that should have been agreed upon at some point previously. Consent is the key factor. Your views may not be my views. Your wants may not be my wants. That is the beauty of a free society. We have the obligation to remember to live and let live. It may not be your choice, but it may very well make someone else happy.


What I have taken out of all of this is that if I want everyone to live freely and be accepted in the life choice they make with anyone else who is also actively agreeing then I owe it to myself & the world around me to live authentically. I must be who I am not just at home, but in the world. The more we show the world how many people & how many choices there really are the more the world will come into balance.

Please visit Spanking Romance Reviews by clicking the icon below to check out our hostess, Casey McKay's main post on this fabulous topic!



23 comments:

  1. Love your cartoon illustrations. How perfect for your post.

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    1. Thanks, Cara! I always have a lot of fun picking out pictures for my blog posts.

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  2. Yes. Consent. Understanding what's come before us. Recognizing that there are many different situations for different people, and creating your own meaning with your own relationship. I love it.

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  3. I think we've pretty much said the same thing - you just said it better than me! Choice - that is it!

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    1. We did...I've noticed a trend with that. We seem to be on the same wavelength a lot of the time! You said it darn well yourself!

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  4. You're right--consent is the key factor. Exploring and being empowered by spankings, hooray! Great post ,Corinne.

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    1. Thanks, Sadey! Spanking Empowerment Activate! LOL

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  5. This says it all: "the beauty of a free society." Great post.

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    1. Thanks, Elise! I enjoyed hearing your thoughts as well. It's great to have new members join the circle!

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  6. I like your comment about going back to a time when tearing down your husband wasn't acceptable, I see so much disrespect (in both directions) that it makes me sad. If you go to work or get together w/your friends and talk about how wonderful your spouse is, people think you're strange, but start complaining and everyone will join in. It's toxic.

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    1. I know and people need to realize that the toxic mind set in any direction just needs to stop. Let's start building each other up and lose the tearing each other down mentality!

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  7. "Your views may not be my views. Your wants may not be my wants, that is the beauty of a free society."

    Well said, Corinne. We all live to different ideals, values and beliefs, but just because ours might differ from the next person's should not make ours our theirs any less valid. Great post.

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    1. Thanks, Tara! I believe that with every fiber of my being.

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  8. love the post! I love how you brought it to consent and talked about the statement "setting feminism back" When I get going on this subject, I'll often clarify "knowledgeable consent"- like the title of my post for this round table. It was with tons of thought, tons of reading etc that I got into this lifestyle- it wasn't forced on me nor was it I haplessly stumbled into- for me, that's an important part of consent

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    1. Yes! I call it informed consent. I do nothing in this life without a whole lot of thought and research going into it. It has been the same with my lifestyle. It wasn't something I stumbled into or that many stumble into. (Even though if they did and then decided that it was for them there is nothing wrong with that either!) I had these desires long before I fully disclosed the extent to my husband. We had to build a relationship of trust first. (We were really young!) After I knew equivocally that I could trust him I laid it all out there. I am so glad I did! It's funny! I don't take kindly to very many telling me what to do, but with the right person I will gladly submit and in fact thrive in it!

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    2. well I stumbled into it, in having my first girlfriend lend me "The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty," but it was giving me language to something I already felt. Trust building can be an interesting thing. In many ways, I didn't necessarily take a lot of time with my Master- I knew of His reputation as He knew of mine in the common circles we moved in. However, reputation saved us from many talks lol. It was only recently though that He finally explored breath play- after 12 years of being together

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  9. It all comes down to respecting that other people have the right to do their thing as long as it doesn't affect you. The problem is, most people aren't secure enough in their own beliefs so someone doing something they think is wrong, rocks their beliefs, and they do the only thing left to them: put the other down to try to bring them back in line with their thought process.

    If we but respect that everyone has the right to do their thing, and there is joy in that, wow would this world be an amazing place. And I agree with Cara. Great images!

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    1. I do agree that the judgement comes from insecurity. I think once we are all secure in our own choices and our own skin it is easier to say to each their own and live and let live. We can choose to live our joy now. The more we live that authentic joy and live it out loud the more it will catch!

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  10. I love that you're also taking the current mode of disrespecting men into consideration. Have you ever noticed how most of the doofuses in TV commercials are men? Is that because men are more hapless than women? No, it's because it's politically correct to run down men now. That certainly has not always been the case. Women were "little women" for a very long time, and that wasn't good either. But, as you point out, we should be equal promoters of humanity. We have that in common, after all.

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  11. Consent and choice are key to understanding D/s in a humanist context, aren't they? Great post, wonder woman!

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  12. I completely agree about the pendulum swinging. It is my biggest pet peeve when I hear one part of a couple put the other part down. I agree a mutual respect should exist in every relationship, if you don't have that I don't now what you have.
    Great post Corinne!

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  13. Great, thought-provoking post, Corinne. I think we think along very similar lines :)

    People are people, every one of us unique and uniquely special, and far more than an aggregation of categories or labels. The idea of 'live and let live' is central to my beliefs, and I love your closing thoughts: such a beautiful way of expressing a positive way to live and hope for the future.

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